Leveraging my unique experience in P&L management, operations, HR, Training, Diversity & Inclusion to share practical and actionable tips, tools, and insights.
Also, just my thoughts on various other topics to add some spice.
I have been
asked why I always seem happy. How do I always have a smile on my face? Why can
my laughter be heard across a room? Why is there always a lot of noise,
clatter, loud voices wherever I am? Normally, when I hear these questions I
just smile them away. But seriously, let me think about happiness. With a smile!
What is
happiness? To me it is a state where I believe that everything is
fine. Everythingis fine. Its all OK. Life, love,
weather, traffic, weight, age, family, friends. Literally, everything!
That does not
mean that there aren’t times when things are not OK.
Yes,
I get sad, angry, worried, panicked, irritated, hassled, stressed and
a whole host of negative emotions. And yes they stay with me for some time. I
have been depressed and battled that for weeks and months. But by and large I
am happy. Why?
I Let the
Unhappiness Out! As often as I can.
When I have
negative emotions, I "let them out" with all the expressiveness I am
known for. I curse in my head; and that is a big thing for me. Remember, I
belong to a generation where ladies were taught not to curse. Yes, the
generation after the one, where ladies fainted on hearing the word
"damn". Yet I curse! Curse in my head, argue
with myself, scream at the walls, wet my pillow, let my tears mingle with
the shower, plot revenge. I recall smaller hurts that pile up over a
period of time. I may have let them out then, but if they still linger, I
let them out again! I let them out as often as I can. Just let them go!
Not to another
person, but to myself.
Not to another
person, for that, many times in the corporate world, would make me seem weak.
Not to another
person, for they are not living my life and may not be able to understand.
Not to another
person, for they should not be burdened by my unhappiness.
All I Have is
the Here and Now. So I Enjoy It!
Courtesy Meenu Iyer
Most of the
time, I am happy. I think I am happy because I like the here and
now. It's the only place I can be.
The past is the
past. Neither you nor I can change it. We can wish we behaved differently. We
can wish we can change it. We can’t. We never could nor can we in
the future.
The future is
far ahead. I can’t bet on something happening in the future as I do not know
all the variables and drivers that impact a future outcome. I try not to expect
too much of the future. If it brings me something I want / need, then I
am happy. If it doesn’t, as I did not expect much, I am less sad.
The only real,
tangible thing I have is the here and now. This moment, this hour, this
day, even at a stretch, this week. What I do today, like writing this post, or
following-up on something, or pre-work for my next assignment, or deciding the menu for dinner when friends
are over this Saturday. This is all I can do. Nothing more and nothing less.
So, I enjoy doing it. I can learn doing it. I can feel proud completing something of
quality well within time.
But, There IS a
Future! So I Try to Plan for an Unpredictable Future.
Not worrying
about the future does not mean don’t plan for it. I know I can’t plan for
everything, so I choose 2 things - financial security and health.
Courtesy www.unl.edu
I started
working with a financial consultant only ~12 years ago, but at least now I know
where I stand. This financial security is largely helped by not being in
debt and not pursuing expensive habits. Also, I don’t plan to leave money or
property for the next generation. I don’t want to die rich. I want to live
rich.
I struggle with
health. All my life I have struggled with weight. I was born an 8lb 8oz
baby and never really managed to be a healthy weight. But I exercise as often
as I can, I try to eat healthy. I have tried dieting a gazillion times. But
none are sustainable. Does it make me unhappy? Sure it does. But, will I
get there? Someday. Someday I will.
I, Me, Myself
My happiness
lies in me. I am constantly working for others, both at work and at home. There
are targets to be met, restructuring to be done, policies to be reviewed, homes
to run, illnesses to deal with, inconsistent household help, groceries to
be bought, bank accounts to be balanced. Sudden demands of me and my time. I do
what I can. I am not trying to win the “Super Woman Award”. I
cannot do everything.
What I can do
is invest in myself, for nothing matters if I am not happy. Whether it is
reading, or watching TV, or chatting with people, or going out dancing with my
friends. I am important. So important, that I spend money, time, effort on
myself. And try not to feel guilty about it.
When I Am Happy And I Know It…… I let everyone know I am happy. Much like the Pharrell Williams song "Happy".
I chat. I smile. I laugh. I pull
a leg. I tell a joke. I share a story. I let the child in me come
out.
If I die
tomorrow, I don’t want to have regrets. I will have worries, of things
not completed. But as far as possible - no regrets. I have done what I could do.
Been the best I could be with both the monster and angel in me.
